


Trust in you

by Wolkje25



Category: Emmerdale, robron
Genre: Established Relationship, Love, M/M, Trust, Trust Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-16
Updated: 2017-01-16
Packaged: 2018-09-18 00:33:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,122
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9354728
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wolkje25/pseuds/Wolkje25
Summary: Aaron finds out that Robert has lied about meeting Rebecca at home farm, but what if Robert discovers Aaron has lied at him as well?





	

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! I have written an one shot! It combines two Prompts I got. I hope you will enjoy!
> 
> Fic is based on the following two prompts:  
> 1\. Aaron finds out that Robert has lied about meeting Rebecca at home farm and the fallout from that. And the crisis talks they have.
> 
> 2\. Robert having had enough (he finds out about the late booking of Manchester) and tells Aaron that they need some space and Aaron says 'no' I trust you because he thinks he's being dumped, and Robert knows he's lying and says I can't keep doing this. And tells Aaron to prove it. Like describe how lonely Aaron feels without Rob. And how he decides to explain to Rob about how much he loves him and wants to be with him.
> 
> ps: The other prompt I got for another fic will hopefully be uploaded tomorrow!! (So sorry for the long wait! <333)

“You lied!” Aaron cried out, slamming the door behind him, as he followed Robert inside the backroom of the pub. 

Robert took a deep breath of air, trying to keep calm, feeling the annoyance grow in his stomach. “So you keep saying,” Robert answered, trying to keep his voice unaffected, pulling of his coat and dropping it over the backrest of the couch.

“This is not just some kind of joke,” Aaron shot out, his voice filled with anger. 

“Oh, I am well aware of that!” Robert replied immediately, with a hint of sarcasm in his voice.

“Don’t give me that,” Aaron warned, his voice low and threatening. 

“What?!” Robert suddenly shot out, turning around, his eyes blazing fire. “What, Aaron?!”

Aaron just shot him an impenetrable look. 

Robert closed his eyes by the look on Aaron’s face, trying to fight the hurt and anger which were about to overwhelm him. “You don’t trust me, do you?” He had spoken the words before he had even thought about the real meaning of the words. But at that moment, he knew they were true as he could just read the flicker of guilt in Aaron’s eyes, before they blazed over with anger. 

“That’s not what this is about! You lied to me!” 

“So you decided to check up on me?! Yeah, because that’s normal behaviour!” Robert shot right back at him.

“And you decided to go behind my back and meet Rebecca of all people!” Aaron yelled.

“I like her!” Robert cried out in anger. 

Silence dawned on them and he read the hurt on Aaron’s face, before he even realized what he had just said. “Not like that,” Robert said, his voice desperate. “I didn’t mean… not like that!”

Aaron’s face started to close off and Robert realized he had said exactly the wrong thing. “Aaron, you know this!” he cried out in desperation, needing to know Aaron really did know deep inside that Robert didn’t feel anything for Rebecca. Because he didn’t, he really didn’t.

“Do I?” 

Robert would rather have had Aaron take a knife to his skin than hearing him speak those words so cold. He spoke to him as if he were a stranger, when for the past months they had been as close as it was possible for two people to be. Aaron reacted as if Robert had crossed some invisible line in the sand. Aaron looked into his eyes and had said whatever would hurt the most, and knowing Robert as Aaron did, that wasn't hard. He had made it sound like every word Robert had said to Aaron about love and honesty had not been heard, or worse, had not been taking seriously. And that knowledge hurt Robert to the core.

“I can’t believe this,” he muttered softly. He moved passed Aaron, not even able to look at him. He grabbed his coat from the couch and retreated to the door. 

“Where are you going?” Aaron asked, his voice filled with too many emotions for Robert to comprehend. 

“I need some air,” Robert just said, without looking back, closing the door behind him.

xXx

Robert knew his face looked like thunder as he walked into the café. He strolled to the counter, ignoring Chas point blank as he ordered an Americano. 

But as he tried to ignore her, he could feel Chas’ eyes on his face, knowing she was not going to let him walk out of here without saying a word. “Having a row, are you?” Chas asked, hitting the nail on the head. He didn’t know how she did that sometimes. It annoyed him immensely. 

“It’s nothing,” he huffed out, knowing his whole body was telling her otherwise. 

Chas just raised one eyebrow and he knew she wasn’t believing a word he had just said. 

Robert sighed, before he said: “He found out I was with Rebecca, while I told him I wasn’t.” He didn’t even look up at her, knowing he would get a reprimand. 

“So you lied to him,” Chas just stated, but he could hear the judgement in her voice. 

“Yes,” Robert said, not even going to deny that fact. “But only because he keeps being paranoid over Rebecca and me.”

Chas turned her head away, the moment Robert looked up at her. But Robert had already seen the guilt crossing over her face and he knew she was keeping something from him. “What? What did you do, Chas?” he asked, wanting to know what she was keeping from him, having seen that look enough times to know she had done something stupid. 

“I might’ve said something to him,” Chas admitted, as she looked up at him. 

Robert tried to keep calm, needing to know what she had said, but deep inside him, his annoyance started to rise. “What did you say?”

Chas sighed, her eyes filled with a silent apology. “That you two might be having an affair.”

Robert could only stare at her with a disbelieving look on his face, as Chas’ words sank in. He knew Chas had her misguided moments, but he could hardly believe she really had been that stupid. 

In the meantime, Chas tried to explain herself: “It was stupid alright. I know that now. I didn’t even really mean it. I told him he should give it a rest, but apparently he can’t. He took it to heart, even told you he had planned this whole trip to Manchester to keep you away from her. I knew the moment I heard about it, he had made that up.”

Robert couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He was completely gobsmacked. “What?”

Chas’ eyes widened, when she realized what she had just said. “I shouldn’t have said anything. I’m sorry. Rob! Robert!”

But Robert pretended he didn’t hear her, as he made his way out of the café. 

xXx

Robert burst through the door to the back room of the pub and noticed Aaron stood up at once, his face pained and nervous. “You’re back.”

Robert didn’t even take the time to register the emotions on Aaron’s face, his anger bursting to the surface. “You’re a hypocrite, you know that,” he shot out.

Aaron looked taken aback by the heat in Robert’s voice. “Sorry?”

“Taking the moral high ground with me about lying, while you invented this whole trip to Manchester to keep me away from Rebecca.” He knew he was being unreasonable, knew it had been wrong of him to lie about something like that, knowing deep down how Aaron felt towards Rebecca. He was aware Aaron could still feel insecure about their relationship. But somehow this, this lie, just was too much for Robert to handle. It was enough. He had enough.

The guilt that was written all over Aaron’s face told Robert all he needed to know. “How did ya-” Aaron started, but Robert interrupted him. 

“Your mum blabbed. But I don’t care about that. I want to know why you think it’s okay to lie to me about something like that.”

Aaron’s expression turned from guilty and upset into anger in seconds. “Says the one who didn’t tell me he was spending the afternoon with Rebecca!”

Robert made a desperate movement with his hands. “Jesus, Aaron! I can’t keep doing this. I don’t know why we bother if you don’t trust me!”

“Of course I trust you!” Aaron cried out. 

Robert felt like laughing hysterically by the lie in Aaron’s words. “You have a funny way of showing that. Making up a trip to keep me away from a girl I have slept with years ago.” 

“A girl who came back because she still had a crush on you and you go behind my back to go and see her,” Aaron fired back: “And on top of that, you lie about it.”

“I lied because I didn’t want to hurt you!” Robert replied, knowing it was stupid to have lied about it, but also knowing he had done it with good intentions. “You lied, because you don’t trust me!”

Robert searched Aaron’s face for an answer and when Aaron looked down and didn’t answer, Robert had the feeling his heart crumbled and his stomach dropped. 

“You’re not even gonna deny it, are ya?” Robert wasn’t able to keep the hurt out of his voice. 

Aaron bit his lower lip, still not looking up and the despair inside Robert’s chest grew as Aaron’s silence was deafening. 

A cold, empty feeling settled inside Robert’s body as the truth settled underneath his skin. “I don’t know how to change that,” Robert said, his voice nothing more than a soft whisper. “I don’t know what I have to do to make you trust me. I honestly don’t.”

When he locked eyes with Aaron, he saw the same grief and sadness in Aaron’s eyes. “What are you sayin?” Aaron asked softly. 

“I don’t know,” Robert answered honestly, his insides crumbling, feeling like crying himself. “Maybe you need to rethink if you even really do want to marry me.” He knew his words hurt Aaron, but at this moment, he really didn’t know what else he could say. He just knew he couldn’t marry someone who didn’t trust him. Not when he loved him too damn much.

xXx

Aaron sat still on his chair, Robert’s words ringing in his ears, no strength to move. His shaky fingers finally came to a rest after running restlessly through his hair. He bit down on his lip trying not to burst into tears. This was not going to help, it was not going to change anything.

Robert had left after he had spoken those hurtful words and Aaron hadn’t even tried to stop him from leaving. 

Trusts were broken, lies had been told, or maybe deep down inside Aaron had always struggled with trusting Robert completely. Deep down he had always had this fear that Robert would eventually grow tired of him, would move on to someone new, more beautiful, a happier, nicer person. Move on from him. 

He was well aware Robert hadn’t had the best trade-record when it came to being faithful. So who said he wouldn’t eventually cheat on him? It wasn’t a given he was going to be faithful. No one could see what was in the future. And it scared Aaron more than anything.

But did he really want to be that way? Hadn’t Robert proven over and over again he wasn’t planning on leaving Aaron any time soon? 

He hurt Robert, because he didn’t trust him enough. Because he didn’t believe he was really enough. He had never been enough for anyone. His dad, his mum, Jackson, even Ed, had all shown him, loving them hadn’t been enough to make them stay. He knew he wasn’t the easiest person to love, had once even believed people were unable to love him. Deep down he was still unsure if he was really worthy of any kind of love at all. 

He could hardly convince himself this time it would be different, that Robert would really be as committed to him as Aaron was to him. So without realizing it, he pulled with one hand and pushed away with the other. He knew he was doing it, but he didn’t know how to stop. But he knew that at one point he would push too hard, and maybe it had already come to that point. He loved Robert and at the same time was scared to, not knowing if he was ever going to be enough.

At times, he had failed to trust him when he should have. But wasn’t that also a sign he truly loved Robert with all his heart- the struggle against jealousy, possession and control?

Because he did, he loved Robert so damn much, it sometimes scared him how much exactly. He couldn’t live without him, couldn’t imagine a life without him in it anymore. Robert gave him so much, made everything a bit brighter. He knew Robert was far from perfect and they were so different. It was a miracle they even worked.

But they did. And Aaron wasn’t willing to give that up, didn’t even know if he could. He’d never had that connection with someone, had never felt like coming home. But he did with Robert. He loved coming home now. He loved how they moved around each other, how they could talk about nothing at all for hours, could sit in silence and still know what the other was thinking with one look. He loved how Robert was so familiar to him, how he felt against his skin, the way they could enjoy the simple things. 

He wanted to marry that man. He did with all his heart. But he couldn’t do that until he finally told Robert what was bothering him, why he had acted the way he did. And the only way he could do that was by opening up to him. And that scared Aaron most of all. Because he wasn’t good at talking, he wasn’t good at letting people know what he was feeling. But if he and Robert really wanted to get a chance, he had to. There was no other way. 

Aaron took a deep intake of breath and stood up. He had somewhere he needed to be. 

xXx

Aaron knocked quite fiercely on the door. This was the only other place left he could think of Robert might’ve gone to. He was turning a little desperate. Because if he wasn’t here, Aaron didn’t know where he would be. Aaron started to fear Robert might’ve actually left the village before he got a chance to talk to him. 

The door opened and Victoria appeared in the doorway, her eyebrows raised in faked annoyance. “Careful there, you might knock the door of its inches.” 

Aaron didn’t even really listen to a word she said, but asked the moment he got the chance: “Vic, Is Robert there?”

Victoria’s face clouded over immediately. “I don’t think this is such a good time,” she said, her voice earnest.

“He is, isn’t he?” Aaron asked, already knowing the truth from the look on his friend’s face.

Her face became strict, almost angry. “He doesn’t want to talk to you. You hurt him, Aaron.”

Aaron swallowed, feeling horrible when he realized how upset Robert really was. “I know. I just want to talk.” Victoria just kept on looking at him with an unmoving expression on her face. But Aaron didn’t care what she might think at the moment. He needed to talk to Robert. It was important. “Robert! Please! I just want to talk,” he yelled, as Victoria’s eyes became big with surprise and maybe this was really the first time she had ever heard him that desperate.

No answer came and Aaron’s heart seemed to sink inside his chest. Victoria looked up at him, for the first time with an apologetic look in her eyes. “I think it’s better if you’d just go.”

“But-” Aaron tried, not even knowing what he wanted to say, knowing he had somehow lost everything in a few hours’ time. 

“I mean it,” Victoria said, still an apologetic look in her eyes: “I’m sorry.”

Aaron could feel the desperation settle in his bones. “There’s just something I need to say to him. Please Vic,” Aaron begged, knowing there was nothing left he could do.

Suddenly a weary, sad voice came from inside the house. “It’s okay, Vic. Let him in.”

Knowing it was Robert’s voice, made Aaron feel a bit better, knowing he still had a chance to make this right. Victoria gave him a stern, warning look, before she moved out of the way and let Aaron pass. 

When he entered and saw Robert sitting alone on the couch, the sadness and loneliness radiating off of him, Aaron stopped in his tracks and couldn’t move for mere moments. 

Victoria appeared behind his shoulders, silently observing the two of them for a moment, before she said softly: “I’ll be upstairs.” Then she moved out of the room and upstairs. 

Aaron didn’t know what to do as the silence dawned on them again, his heart racing against his chest. He slowly moved into the room, until he was stopped by Robert’s voice.

“Why are you here?” Robert asked, his eyes looking up at Aaron, his voice weary, eyes hurt. 

Aaron bit on his lower lip, taking a step forwards, wringing his hands together. “Can I just talk to you?”

Robert just nodded. Aaron sat himself down on one of the chairs in the room, biting his lip, trying to find the right words as an uncomfortable silence dawned on them. 

“I never meant to hurt you,” Aaron eventually said. 

Robert just kept on looking at him, not saying a word, his eyes glazed over with hurt. Seeing that look in Robert’s eyes broke Aaron’s heart and again Aaron was at a loss for words. 

“I just…I am not good at talking about this kind of stuff.” Aaron bit on his lower lip, trying to order the mess inside his mind. “Maybe I am just so scared of losing you, I push you away before that can happen. Before you decide I’m not enough.”

Robert’s eyes became serious. “You are enough. How many times do I have to say that until it gets through?”

“But am I? Am I really?” Aaron asked in all earnest, needing to know, needing to feel like Robert was telling him the truth. 

“Of course you are!” Robert exclaimed, his voice filled with disbelieve and honesty. “Why would you even say that?”

Aaron looked down at his hands before he continued: “Katie wasn’t enough. Chrissie wasn’t enough. How long before you get bored with me? I mean, we just started off as a bit of fun, didn’t we? We were never meant to be real, we were never meant to be more than just an affair.”

“But it wasn’t, was it?”

Aaron frowned his forehead in confusion. “What?”

“Just an affair,” Robert clarified. “It has never really felt like an affair to me. Not really.”

Aaron’s eyes widened by Robert’s admission. They had never really talked about it like that. They had made some inside jokes about it, made fun of it. But they never really talked about it. There were too many bad memories there. So it was the first time Aaron heard Robert confessing this to him. 

Even Robert looked a bit taken aback by his own admission. “I mean, yeah it was, but…at the end you were the only one who counted. Even at the beginning of it all, you occupied my mind more than you should have. I thought about you more than I should have. I wanted to spend my time with you. Even when I was with you, I realized deep down I didn’t want to leave you again. I just wanted to be with you all the time, even though I told myself otherwise. My mood depended on you. Just catching a glimpse of you, brightened my day.” 

Aaron was completely gobsmacked, had never really known it had felt like that for Robert, had never even considered asking about it. But knowing the affair had meant just as much to Robert as it had meant to Aaron, just meant so much to Aaron, he could hardly explain it.

Robert scooted forwards on the couch, his eyes meeting Aaron’s. “You changed my life, Aaron. Before you, I wasn’t who I was meant to be. I hid myself because I was too scared to let the world know who I was inside. But you showed me it was okay to be who I was. You were the only one who saw right through all the walls and facades and saw me. And still loved me.” 

Aaron’s throat felt locked up and he couldn’t form any words, too taken aback by the words Robert was speaking. 

“I’ve never really loved anyone in my life before. Until I met you. Because I love you, Aaron. That’s the only reason I want to marry you. Because I love you. And nothing in this world is gonna change that. Not Chrissie, or Rebecca. No one.”

Aaron felt as if he was going to tear up, still unable to speak. 

“I even put up with the Dingles for you, so if that isn’t love,” Robert continued, his voice turning a bit teasing.

Aaron smiled despite it all, before he got up and turned around, away from Robert.

He could feel Robert standing up behind him. “I have nothing to hide anymore, Aaron. I really don’t,” Robert said, his voice as sincere as Aaron had ever heard it.

Aaron took in a deep shaky breath, trying to keep his emotions under control. He could hardly comprehend what he was hearing, but he was sure of one thing; he believed Robert, with every word he had spoken. He knew Robert spoke the truth when he said, he had nothing to hide anymore and those words meant more than Aaron could ever say. “Okay,” Aaron said, his voice rough as he turned around.

Robert’s expression changed from desperate and sad to a hopeful disbelieve. 

“I believe you,” Aaron continued. And he did, in this moment he believed Robert was telling him the truth. Maybe he had to stop fighting this, maybe he should take a chance for once. He didn’t know what the future would bring, but he wasn’t willing to let this go to waste, because he was too scared. 

“You need to stop lying to me though,” Aaron pointed out, his eyes landing on Robert’s face. 

Robert nodded at once. “I know. I shouldn’t have done that, go behind your back. But you need to start telling me what is bothering you. I’m not psychic Aaron. I can’t read your mind.” Robert stopped speaking for a moment, his mouth quirking up in a smile. “Even though sometimes it might look like I can.”

Aaron rolled his eyes, but smiled lightly. “Shut up.”

Robert just grinned at him, until the smile glided from his face. Aaron felt terrible by the sudden hurtful look on Robert’s face, knowing this whole mess had really hurt Robert. 

He took a deep breath and took a step towards him, looking up at him, his eyes finding Robert’s. He needed to say it, he wanted to say it. He needed for Robert to know his feelings hadn’t changed despite everything. 

“I love you,” he muttered softly, looking up at Robert with an honest expression on his face.

Robert smiled a sad smile. “I know.” He took a step closer to Aaron, his green-blue eyes searching for something in Aaron’s eyes. “And maybe you can learn how to trust me,” he said, his words almost sounding like a question. 

“I want to trust you,” Aaron replied honestly.

“You just can’t yet.” Aaron noticed Robert tried to be positive and not take his words to heart, but he knew how much his words really hurt him. He just couldn’t lie to Robert. Not anymore. Everything had started because they had started lying in the first place. If Aaron was sure about one thing it was that this was only going to work, if they started being honest with each other. 

“I know I can,” Aaron said carefully, having the feeling they were treating unfamiliar territory. “I just need a little time.”

Robert nodded his head, smiling a small smile. “I think we’ve got a bit of that, don’t you?”

Aaron smiled lightly. “I think we do.”

Their eyes met and Aaron felt that familiar fluttering in his stomach. Robert’s eyes were filled with so much love and affection it took Aaron’s breathe away. If it would be anyone else Aaron would’ve dropped his gaze, but with Robert he was drawn in closer, always wanting more. Aaron didn’t even know how it happened, but suddenly Robert’s strong arms were wrapped around his own body and Aaron breathed in Robert’s smell, his hands tightening in Robert’s shirt. The hug was a simple enough gesture - affection, perhaps the fragile beginnings of trust. The arms that held him were soft, yet strong. The feel of Robert’s body so close to his, soothed him more than he had expected. How could it be that he hadn't seen Robert's love for what it was before? Unselfish. Undemanding. Free. 

When Robert pulled back and looked down at him, he whispered the words Aaron hadn’t even realized he needed to hear: "We're okay, you and me. Okay?" Aaron just nodded. No words were needed as he buried his face into the crook of Robert’s neck, Robert’s arms tightening around him. 

Finally, he was home.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Let me know what you think! <333
> 
> Thanks go to my lovely beta; @hayfieldmc. Marie, you are absolutely fabulous!!!


End file.
